


Steamed Hams

by sarahgirl1998



Category: Garfield - All Media Types, Multi-Fandom, Tiny Toon Adventures
Genre: Comedy, Gen, Humor, Parody, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-04 09:55:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17896304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahgirl1998/pseuds/sarahgirl1998
Summary: Furrball just wants to have an unforgettable luncheon with Garfield, but something happens and Furrball may have to use his lies to get out of trouble. Sara's Crossovers.





	Steamed Hams

(Garfield rings the doorbell. Furrball answers it.)

Garfield: Well, Furrball, I made it, despite your directions.

Furrball: Ah, Garfield, welcome. I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon ;)

Garfield: (comes in) Uh-huh.

(He sits down at the table. Furrball goes into the kitchen, but sees smoke coming out of the oven. He gasps and opens it, only to see a burnt roast inside.)

Furrball: Oh, egads! (closes the oven door) My roast is ruined! :(

(Then, however, he sees the Fullerton Burger Joint on the other side of the street. He gets an idea.)

Furrball: But what if... I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? (chuckles evilly to himself) Delightfully devillish, Furrball.

(He starts to climb out the window, only for Garfield to come in and see what he's doing. Cue intro.)

Singers: Furrball with his crazy explanations  
I bet Garfield's gonna need some medication  
When he hears Furrball's lame exaggerations  
There'll be trouble in town tonight

Garfield: FURRBALL!!! :X

Furrball: (looks at him) Garfield! I was just, um... just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise. Care to join me?

Garfield: Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Furrball?

Furrball: Uh... Oh, that isn't smoke, it's steam. Steamed from the steamed clams we're having. Mmm... Steamed clams. :)

(Garfield still looks suspicious, but leaves. Furrball wipes his forehead.)

Furrball: Phew! :phew:

(Then he climbs out the window and heads to the burger joint.)

(Furrball then returns to Garfield holding a plate of hamburgers.)

Furrball: Garfield, I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers!

Garfield: I thought we were having steamed clams.

Furrball: (puts the plate down in front of Garfield) Oh, no, I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers :3

Garfield: You call hamburgers steamed hams? (raising an eyebrow)

Furrball: Yes, it's a regional dialect.

Garfield: Uh-huh. In what region?

Furrball: Uh, upstate New York?

Garfield: Really. (reads from a cue card) Well, I'm from Utica and I've never heard anyone use the phrase, steamed hams.

Furrball: Oh, not from Utica, no, it's an Albany expression.

Garfield: I see.

(Furrball sips some milk from a wine glass while Garfield takes a bite into one of the burgers. He then looks at it.)

Garfield: You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at the Burger Joint.

Furrball: Oh, no, patented Furrball burgers. Old family recipe.

Garfield: For steamed hams.

Furrball: Yes :)

Garfield: Yes. And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled.

Furrball: (realizes his attempts aren't working; tries to think of an excuse) Y-you know... One thing I should... (gets up) Excuse me for one second.

Garfield: Of course.

(Furrball walks into the kitchen, then comes out and stretches, doing a fake yawn as he does so.)

Furrball: Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all, I'm pooped.

Garfield: Yes, well, I should be... (suddenly gets shocked and stands up) GOOD LORD, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE?!

Furrball: Aurora Borealis.

Garfield: A-- AURORA BOREALIS?! At THIS time of year, at THIS time of day, in THIS part of the country, LOCALIZED ENTIRELY IN YOUR KITCHEN?!? :disbelief:

Furrball: Yes.

Garfield: (stops being angry) Can I see it?

Furrball: (beat) No.

(Furrball and Gumball step outside. Suddenly Nermal is heard.)

Nermal: Furrball! The house is on fire!

Furrball: No, Nermal, it's just the Northern Lights. (turns to Garfield)

Garfield: Well, Furrball, you are an odd fellow, but I must say... You steam a good ham. :)

(Furrball smiles at Garfield as the latter walks away. Nermal is heard again, causing Garfield to look back.)

Nermal: Help!!! HELP!!!

(Furrball gives a thumbs up to Garfield, who keeps walking away.)

(NOTE: Everyone is okay and the fire was put out.)


End file.
